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It's finally time to share my full birth story! This will hopefully be helpful for many people as I experienced a few different things during my labour and delivery that are quite common despite my initial hope to have no interventions whatsoever. I did end up loving my full birth experience even though it couldn't all be done naturally, but I'm not upset at it because things were out of my control and it resulted in my healthy Baby Girl being in my arms.
Pre-Labour signs
The biggest sign of labour was how low the baby felt. If you've read my third-trimester post, you'll know that even though I wanted to induce labour naturally ahead of my due date, it didn't happen. I knew that my cervix was closed due to failed attempts at stretch and sweeps so there was no indication of labour due to that, however, the baby felt especially low for several days before I went into labour.
Less than 12 hours before my labour started I'd gone for a Costco run and did a quick trip to Homesense to buy a soap dispenser for my kitchen. During that trip, I saw a fairly fresh newborn in the store and remember thinking, "Will my baby ever show up?" I was already overdue by one day and felt very frustrated after all of my different attempts to induce labour naturally.
A few hours later after eating dinner, doing my final colostrum collection of the day and watching TV with my husband for a few hours, I started looking up videos on going into labour. I go into more detail about this in my post on inducing labour, but I did end up following the video after seeing many comments claiming that it worked.
I'd already been waking up at least once or twice a night for a few weeks to pee at this point due to the baby being so low so I didn't question it when I woke up at midnight to pee. I was feeling slightly crampy, but that was common for me whenever I needed to empty my bladder. Once I finished peeing the crampiness went away and I climbed back into bed and tried getting comfortable again, which wasn't easy at this point being overdue. I'm a good sleeper so I fell back to sleep within ten minutes.
Early Labour
At 3AM I woke up again and this time the crampiness felt stronger. My bladder felt very full again so I peed, but this time when I wiped I noticed a small amount of mucusy blood. I got excited, but made myself calm down because bloody show doesn't necessarily mean that labour had started, it's just a sign that your body is getting ready for it and can happen weeks before labour. I went back into bed, but this time I couldn't get comfortable because the crampy feeling never went away. That's when I noticed that I was feeling minor contractions. I had a contraction timer built into one of my pregnancy apps so I thought I might as well use it since I was too uncomfortable to fall asleep. I'd used it before with braxton hicks and didn't think much of it, but this time I was feeling one every three minutes, though the contractions were only lasting about 30-40 seconds each.
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| The least graphic example I have of bloody show |
I waited an hour before going downstairs and sitting on the toilet. I had a lot more bloody show and lost my mucus plug. The contractions started feeling a bit stronger, but they remained three minutes apart. The only thing making me question whether I was in real labour or not was the fact that they were so short. At this point they'd gotten shorter, maybe 20-40 seconds long. I then went to Dr. Google and freaked myself thinking I was in prodromal labour (which isn't great because that can last several days to a week) and I was not going to be happy about potentially feeling this consistently for days on end.
Another 30 minutes went by and the contractions got a bit stronger. I have a high pain tolerance so they weren't painful, but they were definitely uncomfortable. I noticed at this point if I walked around or sat on the toilet that they were much more intense than lying down and I figured that since they were so close together it'd be best to wake up my husband.
At 4AM my husband started deep cleaning the house like a madman. I thought this was funny because my mom had just done a deep clean earlier that week, but he had the steam mop out and was going all in. He also threw a pizza in for me because one thing my midwife recommended was eating a lot of food early on in labour since a lot of people lose their appetite and then don't have enough energy. This was not an issue for me as I was constantly hungry so I gobbled the entire pizza down as usual. While I ate my husband continued cleaning and packed the car with all of my hospital bags that had been ready to go for weeks. I also decided this was the time to do my hair because I knew as things ramped up I wouldn't feel like it.
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| Hanging out with the pup until the sun came out |
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| Me walking around the driveway to distract myself |
My midwife was off duty at this point so I purposefully waited until she was back before calling her to let her know I was in labour. I essentially stalled my own labour by lying down instead of walking around or bouncing on my exercise ball. I noticed that my three-minute apart contractions became six minutes apart. I did this for several hours until I knew my midwife shift had started. Throughout the day I stuffed my face as much as I could just so I could be ready to go.
Active Labour
When I called my midwife (a few minutes after I knew the timing was perfect for her) my contractions were 3-4 minutes apart and were lasting one minute long. She, of course, told me it was time to go to the hospital and laughed at the fact that I'd purposefully stalled labour. She'd been awake since 8AM, which meant I had 16 hours to have the baby if I wanted her to be there for the entire thing. I was determined to do this since I'd been in labour since 3AM that day anyway and at this point the contractions still weren't bothering me enough. I have an easy time disassociating from pain as long as it isn't too extreme so I just had to pause a bit during contractions and then went on like nothing was happening. We also alerted no one in our families or friend group that I was in labour to avoid people from checking in constantly (and avoid a few individuals from trying to show up at the hospital knowing full well I wanted no visitors).
Driving to the hospital was pretty bad. There was a big event in my city that day and the traffic was horrendous so my usual eight-minute drive to the hospital turned into 30. The constant stop-and-go made me very uncomfortable during contractions, especially because of the upright sitting position. At least my husband had bought my my favourite Dairy Queen blizzard to enjoy so I focused on that until we arrived.
Once we parked I did the long trek to the labour and delivery ward. I'm not exaggerating when I say it was a long walk. It's a super long tunnel and I don't know why they designed it this way. Perhaps to walk the baby out?
When I arrived my midwife brought me into a room to check my progress. While doing this she did a stretch and sweep (finally) since my cervix was obviously finally opened from the contractions. I was only four centimetres dilated, but because I'd been in labour all day she officially admitted me and we went to my birthing room, which was a large room with everything I needed (minus the birthing tub, which was located in its own separate room). I had a private washroom in my room and my husband had a sofa bed that he stayed on most of the time. I spent most of my time pacing around the room and labouring on the toilet (while also using the toilet... apparently labour can make you poop a lot).
A few hours later I was checked again and I hadn't progressed... at all. My midwife did another stretch and sweep and asked if I wanted my water to be broken. She explained that there was about a 50/50 chance that this would either make me progress much faster, or it would make the contractions more intense. I wanted to progress faster so I took the chance and had my water broken. Super easy and not painful at all, it just feels funny when all of the liquid gushes out since it's warm. Soon after the contractions picked up big time. I went from about a 3/10 pain level of contractions to 7/10 very quickly. I was not a fan and decided I'd go to the birthing tubs to try and help relax more with the pain.
About two hours later it was very uncomfortable so we went back to the room and I got checked again. No progress at all. I was frustrated to say the least and my midwife was starting to get worried about my high heart rate. Tha baby's heart was perfect and strong the whole time, but mine was the concern. Because of this, my midwife recommended pitocin to speed things up, which I really didn't want to begin with, but seeing that my body refused to progress on its own and her concern that I might end up needing an emergency c-section if my heart kept getting worse, I said yes.
Once the pitocin started the contractions jumped to a 10/10. Pitocin contractions are no joke and you get no break in between in my experience. I was in so much pain that I was on my tippy toes during every large wave and had my husband using all of his strength to push into my back with his knuckles, which still wasn't enough. I even had a comb to squeeze, which I stopped because it didn't hurt enough and we were worried I would puncture my hands. This is when I asked for the epidural.
Unfortunately for me, I had four other patients ahead of me in line for the epidural. I should've been smart about it and requested one before going on pitocin, but before the pitocin the contractions were still manageable for me without one. It took hours before the anesthesiologist came in and at that point I was 7cm dilated, but I couldn't deal with the pitocin contractions any longer to wait what ended up being several more hours so I hopped on the table and begged for him to be quick.
When I tell you that this anesthesiologist is my new best friend I'm not exaggerating. He got the epidural in so quick on the first try and within two minutes I felt a million times better. I requested for the minimum dose (some hospitals won't do this, but mine does) so that I could control it if I needed more, but I wanted to feel as much as possible. I had no idea that if you have a weak enough epidural that you can still walk around and control your bladder. It was wonderful and the contractions dropped back down to a 3/10 like they were prior to my water breaking.
If I'd known that I'd be able to have full use of my legs and bladder I would've gotten the epidural after breaking my water. I could still feel my contractions (just much less painful), feel the baby kicking and hiccuping, I could feel every touch on my legs and the skin and dilation checks as if I didn't have an epidural. This also meant I still had full control of my pelvic floor, which was very good for when it was time to push.
This is my first baby so once I reached 10cm my midwife wanted me to do a few practice pushes before calling in one of her colleagues to assist with the delivery. She told me what to do and with my first practice push she made me stop because the baby's head was already poking out. I'm apparently a very good pusher and she was shocked and had me wait for her colleague to show up first (about half an hour) before continuing. Waiting to push was difficult because I felt the urge, but it was cool to be able to pet my baby's head and feel her hair while we waited.
Thankfully when the second midwife showed up I was given the clear to push. Even though I had full control over my legs and could do any position I wanted, I did end up pushing on my back in a half-squad position because the hospital bed back was raised. I held my knees up with my feet on my midwife and husband's hips for support and requested a mirror so I could watch the whole thing. I didn't need any assistance since I could feel every contraction and my midwife handed full control over to me.
Within half an hour the baby's head fully came out. The pushing wasn't very hard for me, but I have a very strong pelvic floor and did pelvic floor therapy leading up to the birth to make sure I had good control and could relax my muscles as well. The ring of fire was definitely the worst part and there's really no better way to describe it. It just feels like extreme burning. Something that did help a lot was during pushing my midwife would do aggressive stretches, which helped my skin expand more and I didn't have a vaginal tear at all. My baby's head popped out and she started screaming bloody murder, which was a huge relief to everyone because I am on SSRIs for my anxiety and a big concern with those is that some babies aren't very responsive and if they're not crying loud they have to call in the resuscitation scream to be safe. This was not a concern for me because Baby Girl was PISSED that her head was out, but not her body.
In a few more pushes the baby was fully out. My husband had watched when the head came out, but he's very queasy when it comes to blood and had to sit down because it scared him to see that much blood coming out of me. My midwife caught the baby and put her directly on me and my poor husband immediately regretted not being the one to catch her (he was offered) and immediately said he'd do it for the next one.
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My baby continued screaming as they wiped her off while I held her and then my husband cut the cord since it'd stopped pulsing. My midwife helped latch the baby, though Baby Girl did not want to latch properly no matter how hard we all tried and ended up immediately injuring my nipples (to the point of them cracking) because she has an incredibly strong suck reflex, but wouldn't open her mouth wide enough to get in deep. This was devastating for me because I wanted to breastfeed, but unfortunately, every time we tried, she kept doing it wrong. Even the lactation consultants couldn't get anything to work. I was thankful that I'd harvested a bunch of colostrum so I was able to feed her that while waiting for my nipples to heal a bit since the nurses all said that a fresh newborn's stomach is the size of a marble. This was not the case with my baby, unfortunately, but I'll talk about that more in my breastfeeding journey post.
I didn't have a vaginal tear, but my skin did split in two places ever so slightly. Since it wasn't a vaginal tear, my midwife called in an OB to have a look and he explained that I didn't need stitches at all, but that if I wanted things to look the same as before that he recommended getting a few. I said yes, but didn't realize that since my epidural was so weak that I'd feel every single stitch going in, so that wasn't fun, but it was at least quick. There isn't a specific term for the type of tear I experienced since it was skin splitting and not an actual tear if that makes any sense. One was between my clitoris and urethrea (not touching either though so peeing didn't burn) and one was closer to my butthole, but not touching my vagina at all. It was very odd, but I'm grateful that I didn't have a real tear and that I didn't have to experience discomfort when going to the bathroom.
Once the stitches were done the backup midwife had me go to the bathroom to pee and gave me my very comfortable mesh underwear and giant pad to put on while my main midwife weighed the baby and took down her measurements. I won't give specific numbers, but my baby was in the 99 percentile in length and head size and around the 94 percentile for weight. So I had a pretty big baby, to say the least. While I peed the midwife disconnected my epidural and kept me on pitocin as well as a different drug that I can't remember the name of to help with my heart rate. The pitocin after birth is common for any birth as it helps your uterus contract back down. I didn't feel the painful after-birth contractions that most do so I can't really speak on that, but I wasn't a fan of needing to walk around with the little bag holders (gurneys?). When I was all done in the washroom I sat in the wheelchair and was handed my baby, now in a diaper, and I was rolled to a semi-private room while we waited for my private room to be ready.
My main midwife made it the entire birth and it was only when we went to my room that she had to go home to sleep (legally they can't be awake for more than 24 hours while on a shift), but she'd be back the next day. The other midwife helped set us up and stocked my hospital cart with all of the diapers, pads, mesh underwear, and other supplies I'd need after attempting to latch the baby yet again and having another consultant check for ties (none), she left and my husband and I were free to do all of the tummy time while our sweet Baby Girl slept most of the day away.
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| The only time Baby Girl has ever sucked her thumb |
Several hours later my private room was ready so I set up in there while my husband went back and forth to bring all of our things to the room. Every few hours I'd page a nurse to bring more colostrum to my room to feed the baby and they continued to assure me it was more than she'd get from my breasts. My hospital provides unlimited room service for the mothers so I ordered a lot of food and gobbled it down because my appetite never disappeared aside from different specialists coming in to perform tests on the baby (reaction test, checking joints, blood pressure and heart rate) as well as myself, mainly my heart rate since it was still high, we took turns taking little naps while the other parent watched to make sure the baby was safely on the sleeping parent's chest.
We finally Facetimed my mother and my family and sent photos to my husband's family saying that the baby had arrived. We reminded everyone that we wanted no visitors but promised once we were settled in that we'd send more photos and do Facetime calls. The next day after the routine vitamin K shot, jaundice test (which made me cry because my baby cried pretty hard) and hearing test, we were sent home after a quick confirmation that she was buckled into her car seat correctly.
All in all I had a pretty great birth experience despite not being able to dilate naturally on my own, but now that I know what I know if this happens again next time, I won't hesitate on the epidural since I could feel everything and had complete control! If you're someone who doesn't want the epidural because of the lack of control or feeling, please talk to your midwife or OB about having the minimum dose put in and explain that you'd like control. They can always remove the epidural if you end up not liking it and it's never too late!
Thank you so much for reading my birth story and I hope you'll be back to read about my breastfeeding journey soon!
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